The coughing contents of the Manchester-bound departure gate at Singapore airport offered me my first glimpse of what life would be like back in the UK. Most of the other passengers were English and making their way home from various far-flung holidays. After four months in Asia three things about them were readily apparent; they were predominantly Caucasian, they were physically big (and often comically fat) and they had a burly, unapproachable air about them. Many of them looked like nightclub bouncers.
It was cold, dismal and rainy when we landed in Manchester. I was stopped, questioned and searched by a customs officer. He spent several minutes carefully sniffing my Beedies.
I couldn't help but treat England as another new country and found myself making comparisons with the other places I had visited. It took mere seconds, rather than two hours, to purchase a train ticket for the journey across the Pennines to Leeds. I did not need a reservation. There was a train every hour, rather than one every day. I was able to drink the tap water without worrying that it had come from a contaminated well. The station floor did not have a thousand crippled homeless people sleeping on it. I was not approached and followed for an hour by a heart-breaking weeping begging leper with the bare white bones of his thumbs sticking out of his ruined hands. I didn't see anyone shitting on the ground in front of me. The train set off exactly on time, rather than many hours late. The train was warm and clean and quiet. The people around me were wearing clothes and shoes. There were no cockroaches or rats. Everyone on the train had a newspaper and possessed the ability to read them. We arrived in Leeds six minutes late. I overheard one of my fellow passengers complaining about the poor quality of the British railway system.
My parents were out at work when I arrived home so I spent a couple of hours anxiously pacing the rooms of their house, lost for something to do and trying half-heartedly to perform many pointless tasks simultaneously. I hated the feeling of being back. I felt as if I had been sent to prison. I was looking forward to seeing clip again. I figured that she would be the only familiar thing in an unfamiliar place. But I was wrong, she had already changed back into "home clip" and things were quite strained between us for a while. Boggle and Shithead had been replaced by television.
For the next few days I was paraded around like a circus freak. It was like sitting on a conveyor belt as it trundled through workplaces, family meals, telephone calls and the bedrooms of infirm ladies. I lost control of my life. The most commonly asked question, "did you have a nice time?" and my dutiful answer, "yes thank you," both failed spectacularly to capture any concept about what had actually happened to me over the past year.
Boredom, frustration and depression started to set in. Instead of spending my days doing interesting things, outside in the sunshine, I now found myself spending my days doing nothing, inside a house. The weather in this country is utterly shit. It's always cold, dark, overcast, rainy and windy. People practically climax with enthusiasm when they see a little patch of blue in the sky. Why do we put up with it?
It became clear that I had a choice to make. Either I could struggle and make returning home a long and painful fight against the inevitable, or I could accept that our travels were over, cherish the memories and make the decision to settle back into normal life. I chose the latter but I can feel that our year away has changed the way I am. Our outward behaviour is generally dictated by our immediate surroundings but less-obvious things can change behind the facade. I wonder if my character seems any different to the people who know me.
Here are a few of the things I've learned from our trip, and a few recommendations;
1 The price of a book has got absolutely nothing to do with how good it is.
2 If you photograph everything you see you won't see anything. Look with your eyes. There were dozens of people on the boat with us off the coast of Kaikoura who only saw the whales through their camera viewfinders.
3 You cannot accurately judge anyone from their appearance. On the surface this seems a fairly simple idea to grasp, but putting it into practice is extremely difficult.
4 Generally speaking, the more money you have and the more possessions you covet, the more unhappy you will be.
5 If they have no influence on you or your life, worrying and moaning and complaining about what other people are doing is a pointless waste of your time.
6 If you're on a train journey in the dark in a country where no-one speaks English, it's quite useful to know the name of the station that the train stops at immediately before the one you want to get off at.
7 Read The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen.
8 Read A Million Little Pieces by James Frey.
clip has been successful in getting a job as a Dog Instructor with Hearing Dogs for Deaf People, which is great news. She starts with them at the beginning of February.
I have been back at work for one week. My work colleagues asked, "did you have a nice time?" and I answered, "yes thank you," and everyone said, "you're so thin." I spent my first working night in a hotel near our country office in Maidenhead. The room rate was £141. That one night in Maidenhead cost the equivalent of twenty weeks accommodation in India. Having seen how people in other countries live (starving under tarpaulins with rags for clothes and no shoes) this almost makes me want to cry - we should help them not ignore them. I feel so sorry for them. Next time you go on holiday go to India, or Laos. It will change your life forever.
Those Akha children are in their hilltop wooden-hut village in Laos right now. None of them can read or write. They've never been in a car or seen a television. They're fetching water from a stream and feeding their pigs and chickens. And they're running around and laughing. Their responsibilities are life responsibilities. Our responsibilities have no intrinsic importance. Their happiness is based on true life happiness. Our happiness is based on a series of perceived successes in a purely artificial system.
This will probably be my last blog entry. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Please feel free to email me with any comments or abuse; it would be nice to know what you think.
Take care everyone.
clop
10 January 2004
Our brilliant adventure lasted 359 days.
How much did it cost?
We had no income for a year and were very careful to keep an eye on how much we were spending as we went along. To make this easier for ourselves we bought our famous Book Of Sums and wrote down in it how much we spent each day. "What geeks," I hear you thinking, but it makes an interesting read, and if you are planning to travel perhaps this information will be useful to you.
Flights
Our Round-The-World flight tickets cost £906 per person.
Each ticket included a total of eleven flights; from London to San Francisco, Los Angeles to Fiji, Fiji to Auckland, Auckland to Christchurch, Christchurch to Melbourne, Brisbane to Singapore, Singapore to Hanoi, Bangkok to Singapore, Singapore to Delhi, Bombay to Singapore and Singapore to Manchester.
Insurance
Our comprehensive travel/medical insurance cost £250 per person.
Accommodation Costs
Accommodation Costs for 358 nights came to a total of £2517, an average of £3.52 per person per night.
Travelling Costs
Travelling costs included country visas, bus fares, coach fares, tram fares, taxi fares, tuk-tuk fares, cyclo fares, songthaew fares, train fares, ferry fares, boat fares, hire cars, hire cars petrol, Bertha, Bertha's transfer fee, Bertha's stamp duty, Bertha's rego fee, Bertha's petrol, Bertha's oil, Bertha's repairs, Bertha's servicing, Bertha's depreciation, tools, road tolls and airport departure taxes.
Travelling costs (not including our flights) came to a total of £4024, an average of £5.60 per person per day.
All Other Costs
All Other Costs included food, drinks, beer, clothes, shoes, toiletries, medicines, anti-malarials, insect repellant, suncream, camping equipment, cooking utensils, gas cartridges, internet, printing, phone calls, cinema visits, entrance fees, organised tours, trekking, bicycle hire, motorcycle hire, motorcycle petrol, boat hire, membership fees, maps, books, stationery, pens, postage, games, laundry, haircuts, cloakrooms, batteries, bulbs, contact lenses and all other day-to-day living expenses.
All Other Costs came to a total of £5939, an average of £8.27 per person per day.
So the total cost of our year-long adventure was £7396 per person.
If you're still awake, here are the country averages for each category
Country ...................... Average Accommodation (per person per night)
USA .............................. £10.20
Fiji ................................... £3.50
New Zealand ................ £2.90
Australia ........................ £3.65
Singapore ..................... £9.15
Malaysia ........................ £1.88
Thailand ........................ £1.78
Laos ............................... £1.05
Vietnam ......................... £1.55
India ............................... £3.40
Country ...................... Average Travelling Costs (per person per day)
USA .............................. £14.82
Fiji ................................... £2.28
New Zealand ................ £6.74
Australia ........................ £6.46
Singapore ..................... £1.00
Malaysia ........................ £1.67
Thailand ........................ £1.63
Laos ............................... £2.69
Vietnam ......................... £2.70
India ............................... £6.38
Country ...................... Average All Other Costs (per person per day)
USA .............................. £16.43
Fiji ................................... £5.82
New Zealand .............. £19.16
Australia ...................... £11.24
Singapore ..................... £2.90
Malaysia ........................ £4.35
Thailand ........................ £5.09
Laos ............................... £4.76
Vietnam ......................... £4.20
India ............................... £6.72
and here are the country averages for the total cost
Country ...................... Average Total Cost (per person per day)
USA .............................. £41.45
Fiji ................................. £11.60
New Zealand .............. £23.80
Australia ...................... £18.95
Singapore ................... £13.05
Malaysia ........................ £7.90
Thailand ........................ £8.50
Laos ............................... £8.50
Vietnam ......................... £8.45
India ............................. £16.50
How much did it cost?
We had no income for a year and were very careful to keep an eye on how much we were spending as we went along. To make this easier for ourselves we bought our famous Book Of Sums and wrote down in it how much we spent each day. "What geeks," I hear you thinking, but it makes an interesting read, and if you are planning to travel perhaps this information will be useful to you.
Flights
Our Round-The-World flight tickets cost £906 per person.
Each ticket included a total of eleven flights; from London to San Francisco, Los Angeles to Fiji, Fiji to Auckland, Auckland to Christchurch, Christchurch to Melbourne, Brisbane to Singapore, Singapore to Hanoi, Bangkok to Singapore, Singapore to Delhi, Bombay to Singapore and Singapore to Manchester.
Insurance
Our comprehensive travel/medical insurance cost £250 per person.
Accommodation Costs
Accommodation Costs for 358 nights came to a total of £2517, an average of £3.52 per person per night.
Travelling Costs
Travelling costs included country visas, bus fares, coach fares, tram fares, taxi fares, tuk-tuk fares, cyclo fares, songthaew fares, train fares, ferry fares, boat fares, hire cars, hire cars petrol, Bertha, Bertha's transfer fee, Bertha's stamp duty, Bertha's rego fee, Bertha's petrol, Bertha's oil, Bertha's repairs, Bertha's servicing, Bertha's depreciation, tools, road tolls and airport departure taxes.
Travelling costs (not including our flights) came to a total of £4024, an average of £5.60 per person per day.
All Other Costs
All Other Costs included food, drinks, beer, clothes, shoes, toiletries, medicines, anti-malarials, insect repellant, suncream, camping equipment, cooking utensils, gas cartridges, internet, printing, phone calls, cinema visits, entrance fees, organised tours, trekking, bicycle hire, motorcycle hire, motorcycle petrol, boat hire, membership fees, maps, books, stationery, pens, postage, games, laundry, haircuts, cloakrooms, batteries, bulbs, contact lenses and all other day-to-day living expenses.
All Other Costs came to a total of £5939, an average of £8.27 per person per day.
So the total cost of our year-long adventure was £7396 per person.
If you're still awake, here are the country averages for each category
Country ...................... Average Accommodation (per person per night)
USA .............................. £10.20
Fiji ................................... £3.50
New Zealand ................ £2.90
Australia ........................ £3.65
Singapore ..................... £9.15
Malaysia ........................ £1.88
Thailand ........................ £1.78
Laos ............................... £1.05
Vietnam ......................... £1.55
India ............................... £3.40
Country ...................... Average Travelling Costs (per person per day)
USA .............................. £14.82
Fiji ................................... £2.28
New Zealand ................ £6.74
Australia ........................ £6.46
Singapore ..................... £1.00
Malaysia ........................ £1.67
Thailand ........................ £1.63
Laos ............................... £2.69
Vietnam ......................... £2.70
India ............................... £6.38
Country ...................... Average All Other Costs (per person per day)
USA .............................. £16.43
Fiji ................................... £5.82
New Zealand .............. £19.16
Australia ...................... £11.24
Singapore ..................... £2.90
Malaysia ........................ £4.35
Thailand ........................ £5.09
Laos ............................... £4.76
Vietnam ......................... £4.20
India ............................... £6.72
and here are the country averages for the total cost
Country ...................... Average Total Cost (per person per day)
USA .............................. £41.45
Fiji ................................. £11.60
New Zealand .............. £23.80
Australia ...................... £18.95
Singapore ................... £13.05
Malaysia ........................ £7.90
Thailand ........................ £8.50
Laos ............................... £8.50
Vietnam ......................... £8.45
India ............................. £16.50
08 January 2004
Travelling by local buses in India is not only cheap but also marvellous fun. Numerous private companies ply each route with grotty battered old buses with ripped seat covers. As usual in Asia the scheduled departure times are academic - the buses leave when they are full. In order to attract passengers and speed up the filling process the conductor stands near the back of the bus and slaps the bodywork and screams the destination (for example, "panajipanajipanajipanajipanajipanajipanajipanajipanajipanaji") at the top of his lungs whilst the driver revs the living shit out of the engine and rocks the bus back and forth as if it is about to set off. But of course it isn't about to set off. This slapping and screaming and revving and rocking back and forth usually continues for a good fifteen minutes or so. More than enough time to set your teeth on edge if you're crammed in the back seat sweating. Even when the bus does set off there are still things that can go wrong. As my bus from Mapusa to Anjuna was finally lurching its way across the bus station to the exit gate a gang of men armed with wooden sticks dragged our driver from his cab and beat him up alongside the bus. A substitute driver was supplied for the journey.
Throughout most of Asia public displays of affection between men and women are considered offensive. In some places even holding hands can cause grave offence. Strangely enough, this aversion does not apply to public displays of affection between (heterosexual) men. It is very common to see Asian men walking hand in hand or arm in arm. On buses they drape their arms around each others necks and gently pinch each others cheeks. In restaurants they fondle each others hair whilst eating. clip thought it was nice and I kind of envy the Asians - they are so much more comfortable with tactile friendship than we are back home.
We spent a day sightseeing in Old Goa and took a ferry across to Divar Island. Churches were very much the theme of the day.
A few more days sunbathing and then it was time to catch the overnight train from Goa to Bombay. We arrived at 6:30am with fourteen hours to kill before our flights home. We spent a while walking around between all the people sleeping on the streets. We drank some chai. We optimistically bought tickets for a half-day bus tour of Bombay city centre (1ukp). We thought it would give us something to do.
The tour bus was of the usual grotty battered variety. There was some confusion about which bus we should get on. The bus set off an hour late. We were the only white people on the tour. We couldn't understand the grossly distorted commentary. After a stop at the Gateway To India and the Taj Hotel we were moved onto a different tour bus. We were the only white people on the new bus. We couldn't understand the hoarsely shouted commentary. We stopped to see the sea and an aquarium. Neil played the "Find The Card Game" and immediately lost 100rps. We drove past the Towers Of Silence - stone pillars where human corpses are left out for vultures to eat. We visited a temple.
At 2pm we discovered that everyone on the bus (except us) was on the full day tour. Unfortunately we discovered this halfway round (and at the apogee of) the full day tour circuit. We were informed that our half day tour was over and told to get off the bus. We were 6km away from the starting point, without a map. We were a bit bamboozled. There was an argument. The commentary man suggested we hail a taxi. We argued and held up the bus for a while but of course we didn't get anywhere. In the end we had to take a local bus back into town.
clip and I have answered a little questionnaire about our adventure.
Which two countries would you most recommend others to visit?
clip
Laos because of the fabulous, friendly people and the fantastic unspoilt scenery.
Australia because of the wildlife (particularly koalas) and the fact it's so big and the landscape is so varied.
clop
Laos because it was the country least-affected by tourism, particularly the northern parts. The Lao people were exceptionally friendly and genuine, travelling around was frequently a proper adventure and the landscape was the best I have ever seen.
Australia because I loved everything about it. In general the people are friendly by default and they have an inate sense of fun and adventure, the variety of wildlife is awesome, the landscape is incredibly varied, the weather is great and it is so sparsely populated that you can achieve true isolation without straying very far from "home".
And I have to mention the eastern Malaysian islands Tioman and Perhentian. It's worth going to Malaysia for these alone.
Which two countries would you least recommend others to visit?
clip
Vietnam because although the people were friendly they were over-persistant and it was not relaxing at all. It was an ugly country too.
Fiji was the dullest horriblest place ever. It was too hot, too humid, there were too many biting bugs, there's nothing to see or do, it's dirty and generally really crap.
clop
Looking back I cannot remember a single thing about Vietnam that would make me want to go there again. The scenery was nice in some parts but hardly remarkable, the people hassled us relentlessly which made it hard to relax and the general attitute did not make me feel welcome as a visitor.
I'll have to say Fiji as well, though I don't think we gave it a chance. We were trapped in the same place for a week, much of it spent vomiting, sweating and being bitten in a waterlogged tent. Perhaps if we had explored the other parts I would not be so negative.
What are your best memories/moments of the trip?
clip
It's very hard to pinpoint my best memories because the whole trip was one great memory.
I would say that skydiving was definitely a fabulous moment if for no other reason than I never thought I'd have the bottle to do anything that scary. I would do it again.
Holding Zagget my koala would have to be another great moment. It made me realise that I am meant to own one at some point in my life. They are by far the cutest animal ever.
Our first night in Bertha on the Great Ocean Road was lovely because it was the start of proper Aussie travelling and a long-awaited escape from Melbourne.
Whale watching in Kaikoura was very exciting. I couldn't help but cry when I was waved at with its huge tail.
Surviving the trip between Laos and Vietnam. I truly thought that we weren't going to arrive alive. This is one of my worst moments too.
clop
Like clip said, the whole trip was one long great memory, but I can pick out a few special moments.
My best memory is snorkelling with huge sea turtles off the beach of Pulau Perhentian Besar in Malaysia. I could have stayed out there for weeks with those turtles. They came up to the surface just a few feet away and looked right at you. They were fantastic.
I also enjoyed sitting alone with clip in a forest in Australia for half an hour watching a wild Duck-billed Platypus swimming around and foraging for food in the river in front of us.
Selling Bertha was a truly wonderful moment. We were so relieved when we walked away with $3000 cash in our hands that we couldn't stop laughing and whooping.
River-tubing squiffy near Vang Vieng in Laos was the most relaxing moment of the year. The scenery was staggering and it was all so quiet and peaceful.
What are your worst memories/moments of the trip?
clip
Fiji. I keep trying to block out the fact that we even went there at all and it gives me shivers whenever I remember it.
As I said on the last question, the trip on the 24 hour bus journey between Laos and Vietnam. I cried when I saw what we were going to be travelling in and the fact that nobody seemed to speak English and everybody seemed to want to go to different places. I was very scared.
Going home the first time. I am very glad I did go because otherwise I wouldn't have got to see my Grandma again but saying goodbye to clop at the airport I would say is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I felt like my life was ending.
clop
clip going home the first time. It was horrible. I've never been so upset in my life.
Discovering that clip had lost all her flights. It was such a shock when we found out what had happened that we couldn't think of anything to say to each other for a while. We thought the whole of the Asian portion of our trip was going to be ruined though in retrospect I think we had a much better time overlanding than we would have had if we had flown.
Breaking my dad's new boomerang when the wind blew it over some tarmac.
My encounter with S Parker Mechanical Disasters. I wonder how many other travellers' lives he has mucked up. Everything is still being investigated by the Western Australian government - watch this space.
What are the most irritating things you remember about the trip?
clip
Fiji and the Indian Embassy in Vietnam - what an idiotic system.
clop
Accidentally leaving things behind. We did not have anything stolen from us all year long. The only things we lost we lost ourselves. It was so irritating each time we realised what we'd done. Our water carrier, our cutlery, clip's jumper, our Yahtzee dice, my scissors, our Indochina map, my palm, my blue cup etc. Grrr.
Noisy neighbours. clip and I made an effort to keep quiet late at night or early in the morning but some travellers seem to deliberately make as much noise as possible at any time they like. Talking loudly or shouting or banging or stamping around. I wish people could be more considerate.
The Indian Embassy in Saigon. I start trembling with annoyance when I think about that place.
And, of course, the flies in the outback.
What are your biggest regrets about the trip?
clip
I don't think I have any real regrets about the trip, it was a fabulous experience. I do regret not being able to visit Cambodia; I was really looking forward to going there and, well, maybe my only other regret is not pinching a koala. I so want one of those.
clop
I regret not visiting the Great Barrier Reef from Cairns. We hated Cairns so much that we moved on before we realised what we were missing.
The Full Moon Party at Haad Rin on Ko Pha Ngan in Thailand. What a waste of time and money that was.
***************************************************
Phew. I'm now using one of the free internet terminals in Singapore airport. I've just paid S$8, the equivalent of three nights accommodation in India, to have a shower (3ukp). There was a sign telling you not to take more than fifteen minutes so I deliberately stayed under the water under my fingers went wrinkly. And then I had a shave. S$8 for a shower! They can get stuffed. You should get the sodding shower for the whole day for that much money.
My flight to Manchester leaves in under four hours. I feel very peculiar. I can't remember home properly. I feel as though it is somebody else going home, not me; I'm just an observer. It is not a nice feeling.
Throughout most of Asia public displays of affection between men and women are considered offensive. In some places even holding hands can cause grave offence. Strangely enough, this aversion does not apply to public displays of affection between (heterosexual) men. It is very common to see Asian men walking hand in hand or arm in arm. On buses they drape their arms around each others necks and gently pinch each others cheeks. In restaurants they fondle each others hair whilst eating. clip thought it was nice and I kind of envy the Asians - they are so much more comfortable with tactile friendship than we are back home.
We spent a day sightseeing in Old Goa and took a ferry across to Divar Island. Churches were very much the theme of the day.
A few more days sunbathing and then it was time to catch the overnight train from Goa to Bombay. We arrived at 6:30am with fourteen hours to kill before our flights home. We spent a while walking around between all the people sleeping on the streets. We drank some chai. We optimistically bought tickets for a half-day bus tour of Bombay city centre (1ukp). We thought it would give us something to do.
The tour bus was of the usual grotty battered variety. There was some confusion about which bus we should get on. The bus set off an hour late. We were the only white people on the tour. We couldn't understand the grossly distorted commentary. After a stop at the Gateway To India and the Taj Hotel we were moved onto a different tour bus. We were the only white people on the new bus. We couldn't understand the hoarsely shouted commentary. We stopped to see the sea and an aquarium. Neil played the "Find The Card Game" and immediately lost 100rps. We drove past the Towers Of Silence - stone pillars where human corpses are left out for vultures to eat. We visited a temple.
At 2pm we discovered that everyone on the bus (except us) was on the full day tour. Unfortunately we discovered this halfway round (and at the apogee of) the full day tour circuit. We were informed that our half day tour was over and told to get off the bus. We were 6km away from the starting point, without a map. We were a bit bamboozled. There was an argument. The commentary man suggested we hail a taxi. We argued and held up the bus for a while but of course we didn't get anywhere. In the end we had to take a local bus back into town.
clip and I have answered a little questionnaire about our adventure.
Which two countries would you most recommend others to visit?
clip
Laos because of the fabulous, friendly people and the fantastic unspoilt scenery.
Australia because of the wildlife (particularly koalas) and the fact it's so big and the landscape is so varied.
clop
Laos because it was the country least-affected by tourism, particularly the northern parts. The Lao people were exceptionally friendly and genuine, travelling around was frequently a proper adventure and the landscape was the best I have ever seen.
Australia because I loved everything about it. In general the people are friendly by default and they have an inate sense of fun and adventure, the variety of wildlife is awesome, the landscape is incredibly varied, the weather is great and it is so sparsely populated that you can achieve true isolation without straying very far from "home".
And I have to mention the eastern Malaysian islands Tioman and Perhentian. It's worth going to Malaysia for these alone.
Which two countries would you least recommend others to visit?
clip
Vietnam because although the people were friendly they were over-persistant and it was not relaxing at all. It was an ugly country too.
Fiji was the dullest horriblest place ever. It was too hot, too humid, there were too many biting bugs, there's nothing to see or do, it's dirty and generally really crap.
clop
Looking back I cannot remember a single thing about Vietnam that would make me want to go there again. The scenery was nice in some parts but hardly remarkable, the people hassled us relentlessly which made it hard to relax and the general attitute did not make me feel welcome as a visitor.
I'll have to say Fiji as well, though I don't think we gave it a chance. We were trapped in the same place for a week, much of it spent vomiting, sweating and being bitten in a waterlogged tent. Perhaps if we had explored the other parts I would not be so negative.
What are your best memories/moments of the trip?
clip
It's very hard to pinpoint my best memories because the whole trip was one great memory.
I would say that skydiving was definitely a fabulous moment if for no other reason than I never thought I'd have the bottle to do anything that scary. I would do it again.
Holding Zagget my koala would have to be another great moment. It made me realise that I am meant to own one at some point in my life. They are by far the cutest animal ever.
Our first night in Bertha on the Great Ocean Road was lovely because it was the start of proper Aussie travelling and a long-awaited escape from Melbourne.
Whale watching in Kaikoura was very exciting. I couldn't help but cry when I was waved at with its huge tail.
Surviving the trip between Laos and Vietnam. I truly thought that we weren't going to arrive alive. This is one of my worst moments too.
clop
Like clip said, the whole trip was one long great memory, but I can pick out a few special moments.
My best memory is snorkelling with huge sea turtles off the beach of Pulau Perhentian Besar in Malaysia. I could have stayed out there for weeks with those turtles. They came up to the surface just a few feet away and looked right at you. They were fantastic.
I also enjoyed sitting alone with clip in a forest in Australia for half an hour watching a wild Duck-billed Platypus swimming around and foraging for food in the river in front of us.
Selling Bertha was a truly wonderful moment. We were so relieved when we walked away with $3000 cash in our hands that we couldn't stop laughing and whooping.
River-tubing squiffy near Vang Vieng in Laos was the most relaxing moment of the year. The scenery was staggering and it was all so quiet and peaceful.
What are your worst memories/moments of the trip?
clip
Fiji. I keep trying to block out the fact that we even went there at all and it gives me shivers whenever I remember it.
As I said on the last question, the trip on the 24 hour bus journey between Laos and Vietnam. I cried when I saw what we were going to be travelling in and the fact that nobody seemed to speak English and everybody seemed to want to go to different places. I was very scared.
Going home the first time. I am very glad I did go because otherwise I wouldn't have got to see my Grandma again but saying goodbye to clop at the airport I would say is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I felt like my life was ending.
clop
clip going home the first time. It was horrible. I've never been so upset in my life.
Discovering that clip had lost all her flights. It was such a shock when we found out what had happened that we couldn't think of anything to say to each other for a while. We thought the whole of the Asian portion of our trip was going to be ruined though in retrospect I think we had a much better time overlanding than we would have had if we had flown.
Breaking my dad's new boomerang when the wind blew it over some tarmac.
My encounter with S Parker Mechanical Disasters. I wonder how many other travellers' lives he has mucked up. Everything is still being investigated by the Western Australian government - watch this space.
What are the most irritating things you remember about the trip?
clip
Fiji and the Indian Embassy in Vietnam - what an idiotic system.
clop
Accidentally leaving things behind. We did not have anything stolen from us all year long. The only things we lost we lost ourselves. It was so irritating each time we realised what we'd done. Our water carrier, our cutlery, clip's jumper, our Yahtzee dice, my scissors, our Indochina map, my palm, my blue cup etc. Grrr.
Noisy neighbours. clip and I made an effort to keep quiet late at night or early in the morning but some travellers seem to deliberately make as much noise as possible at any time they like. Talking loudly or shouting or banging or stamping around. I wish people could be more considerate.
The Indian Embassy in Saigon. I start trembling with annoyance when I think about that place.
And, of course, the flies in the outback.
What are your biggest regrets about the trip?
clip
I don't think I have any real regrets about the trip, it was a fabulous experience. I do regret not being able to visit Cambodia; I was really looking forward to going there and, well, maybe my only other regret is not pinching a koala. I so want one of those.
clop
I regret not visiting the Great Barrier Reef from Cairns. We hated Cairns so much that we moved on before we realised what we were missing.
The Full Moon Party at Haad Rin on Ko Pha Ngan in Thailand. What a waste of time and money that was.
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Phew. I'm now using one of the free internet terminals in Singapore airport. I've just paid S$8, the equivalent of three nights accommodation in India, to have a shower (3ukp). There was a sign telling you not to take more than fifteen minutes so I deliberately stayed under the water under my fingers went wrinkly. And then I had a shave. S$8 for a shower! They can get stuffed. You should get the sodding shower for the whole day for that much money.
My flight to Manchester leaves in under four hours. I feel very peculiar. I can't remember home properly. I feel as though it is somebody else going home, not me; I'm just an observer. It is not a nice feeling.
04 January 2004
Recently I have discovered the existence of an inconvenient condition which affects males when they are sunbathing. I have named it "Sunbed Knob".
I don't know if it is the design of my swimming trunks, the spacing of the plastic ribs across the sunbeds or the fact that I am always surrounded by at least a hundred bored onlookers but I can guarantee that, after just five minutes of sunbathing, things will be maddeningly out-of-place downstairs, no matter how well-positioned things were when I first laid down.
And there is never an easy way to resolve the situation. Well, not without extensively groping yourself in full view anyway.
Does anyone have any ideas as to how I can avoid this affliction?
I don't know if it is the design of my swimming trunks, the spacing of the plastic ribs across the sunbeds or the fact that I am always surrounded by at least a hundred bored onlookers but I can guarantee that, after just five minutes of sunbathing, things will be maddeningly out-of-place downstairs, no matter how well-positioned things were when I first laid down.
And there is never an easy way to resolve the situation. Well, not without extensively groping yourself in full view anyway.
Does anyone have any ideas as to how I can avoid this affliction?
02 January 2004
We wanted to visit Palolem beach, located some 100km south of Anjuna, after Christmas but knew that it would be impossible to find accommodation in Anjuna when we got back, during the run-up to New Year. So we decided to leave our big rucksacks in our Anjuna room for a few days while we went to Palolem, ignoring the fact that we would be paying for an unused room.
The journey to Palolem involved four local buses (Anjuna-Mapusa, Mapusa-Panjim, Panjim-Margao, Margao-Palolem) and took four and a half hours. The return trip cost 88p each - not bad considering that the organised tour price is 12.85ukp.
Palolem is famed for being one of the nicest beaches in Goa and having "Thai-style" wooden beach huts that you can sleep in. It was indeed very pretty but there were several hundred of these huts crammed together in the palm trees along the top of the beach and they were nothing like the beach huts we stayed in this year in Malaysia and Thailand. The huts in Malaysia and Thailand were made of bamboo and woven leaves, had thatched roofs and cost 1.50ukp per night; the huts in Palolem were made of plywood and beach mats, had bright blue plastic sheets for roofs and cost 6.30ukp per night. A more cynical person may have noted the presence of an extremely successful marketing campaign. The place was packed with haughty and sullen travellers, the kind of lard-haired campfire-guitarist twerps who spend their time complaining about everything, brooding cross-legged in their cliquey posing groups and showing off their tassle-twirling prowess on the beach. Many of them were Israeli and had throat problems.
When we arrived back in Anjuna we got told off by Santos, the owner of our guesthouse. He had been wondering where we had been for the last three days. Whilst we had been in Palolem more than forty people had come looking for rooms and some had offered him more than double what we were paying. Heh heh heh!
We were woken up several times during the night by the rhythmic squeaking of our neighbours' bed inching across their bedroom floor. On each occasion we were soothed back to sleep by their post-coital musical greetings card.
New Year's Eve wasn't bad at all. We went to an open-air Goan trance club in Vagator called the Ninebar, then to Primrose Bar, then to a free 36-hour, open-air Goan trance rave party in Disco Valley off Vagator beach. Blimey what a great night.
I miss clip terribly. I miss her peering into dank bathrooms looking for creepy crawlies; I miss us playing Shithead to see who has to make the morning coffees; I miss her saying that everything stinks; I miss the amusing way she packs her rucksack and flattens the bed clothes; I miss her obsession with avoiding mosquitoes; I miss her worrywartness; I miss her saying she is shtufften. It felt as though my travels ended when she went home, despite the time I am now spending in India. I feel like I am on holiday for a couple of weeks; it's like a buffer between the travelling world and the real world.
The journey to Palolem involved four local buses (Anjuna-Mapusa, Mapusa-Panjim, Panjim-Margao, Margao-Palolem) and took four and a half hours. The return trip cost 88p each - not bad considering that the organised tour price is 12.85ukp.
Palolem is famed for being one of the nicest beaches in Goa and having "Thai-style" wooden beach huts that you can sleep in. It was indeed very pretty but there were several hundred of these huts crammed together in the palm trees along the top of the beach and they were nothing like the beach huts we stayed in this year in Malaysia and Thailand. The huts in Malaysia and Thailand were made of bamboo and woven leaves, had thatched roofs and cost 1.50ukp per night; the huts in Palolem were made of plywood and beach mats, had bright blue plastic sheets for roofs and cost 6.30ukp per night. A more cynical person may have noted the presence of an extremely successful marketing campaign. The place was packed with haughty and sullen travellers, the kind of lard-haired campfire-guitarist twerps who spend their time complaining about everything, brooding cross-legged in their cliquey posing groups and showing off their tassle-twirling prowess on the beach. Many of them were Israeli and had throat problems.
When we arrived back in Anjuna we got told off by Santos, the owner of our guesthouse. He had been wondering where we had been for the last three days. Whilst we had been in Palolem more than forty people had come looking for rooms and some had offered him more than double what we were paying. Heh heh heh!
We were woken up several times during the night by the rhythmic squeaking of our neighbours' bed inching across their bedroom floor. On each occasion we were soothed back to sleep by their post-coital musical greetings card.
New Year's Eve wasn't bad at all. We went to an open-air Goan trance club in Vagator called the Ninebar, then to Primrose Bar, then to a free 36-hour, open-air Goan trance rave party in Disco Valley off Vagator beach. Blimey what a great night.
I miss clip terribly. I miss her peering into dank bathrooms looking for creepy crawlies; I miss us playing Shithead to see who has to make the morning coffees; I miss her saying that everything stinks; I miss the amusing way she packs her rucksack and flattens the bed clothes; I miss her obsession with avoiding mosquitoes; I miss her worrywartness; I miss her saying she is shtufften. It felt as though my travels ended when she went home, despite the time I am now spending in India. I feel like I am on holiday for a couple of weeks; it's like a buffer between the travelling world and the real world.
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- Our brilliant adventure lasted 359 days. How much...
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- Travelling by local buses in India is not only che...
- Recently I have discovered the existence of an inc...
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- Happy New Year everyone. love clop
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